On June 16th I’ll be Celebrating One year of blogging/therapeutic writing and My Birthday Double WAMMY!! But i am particularly excited about my latest accomplishment… letting the cat out of the bag.
Alright! ** cough cough** While i was having a monologue with myself mr X made a comment in the effect of let me know where you are coming from ? I have always had a hard time articulating some of the things that life has thrown at me-good or ugly, as for the upsetting scenes i witness, i always felt like they were too deep to be told; when i look back at my choices, i strongly believe that; i was more comfortable with silencing the issue while hoping it will be gone with the wind
I HAD TO SPILL THE BEANS …. For the very first time I SAID IT; LIKE IT IS no sugar-coating
In the past, each time the topic of abusive relationship/marriage or physically abusive behaviour surfaced, i often tip-toed my way out of the conversation or sugar-coated my version by blurting stuff like;
I’ve hear a lot of heart wrenching stories from the women who visit the shelter at which I volunteer or narrated the story of the college roomy who was extremely abusive to her college sweet heart
For several years, i intentionally forgot to mention that as a child, I constantly witness the man who was meant to be a role model to his daughter strike my own precious mother to the ground with his fist. Up until my late teens, I wiped every single hot tears that burnt momma’s face while wondering why she hadn’t left this co-ward of a man. I resented him for every black-eye and resented her even more because she kept going for more – Crazy stuff!! Thankfully, my father’s aging has been the greatest blessing to our family as he is now bent on correcting his wrong, it’s been five year’s since the physical violence has stopped but it takes time to forget; i guess momma must have the Lord himself abiding in her to forgive and forget so easily, come to think of it i wasn’t physically abused but i just got over the forgiveness part and still working hard on forgetting.
Overall I’m glad to enter a new birth year, i am finally comfortable with my story, it has shaped me BUT can no longer define me
Silence No More – Tell Your Story