Calm an Anxious heart

Tags

, , , , ,

This is for all the odd mornings that; I wake up realizing that am going to need more than my alarm clock to get out of my bed.

This for those mornings that; I have to take a deeper breath to ground myself, else I might not step my foot on the ground.

This is for all the mornings that; I realize that it is yet another day that I wake up with a locked throat and a sore shoulder and back.

This for those mornings that; I do not wake up as my bubbly self and I have to make a conscious decision to do my breathing excerises and drink some water.

IMG_0374.PNG

This for all the odd morning that; I cannot snap-out-of-it. So, I crawl out of bed feeling vulnerable and slightly disoriented.

This is for all of those mornings and odd hours of my day that have been punctuated by generalized anxiety disorder.

This for all those victorious mornings that; i slowly allow a breath of fresh air to run through my lungs into my nostrils till I feel the tightness around the muscles beneath my shoulder blades and lower back relax.

This is for a morning like today, when i wake up to the realization that I need to breathe a little longer, a little deeper to regain the normalcy of my day.

Just Breathe …

Intimacy … A single’s perspective

Tags

, , , , , , ,

IMG_0354.JPG

I have been taking myself to place where I normally prefer to be with company. I getting the awakening sensation that I am currently exploring a different facade of my singleness. And it feels good!!! I don’t exactly have a date on the calendar which I can point out to you, when I started feeling like; I don’t deserve to put my life on hold.

This isn’t about the single life of party or the lonely cat lady. But, mostly how I have chosen to become intimate with myself by knowing what triggers my anxiety, picking the retail therapy of my choice preferably Anthropology or Joe Fresh 😄, which Netflix movie does the trick when my girl pal is on a hot date, It the kind of intimacy that rhymes with taking a hot bath, lightening up my vanilla candles, enjoying my glass of wine or cheese platter by myself in the comfort of my home. Without feeling like am missing out on life… Without feeling like I need to will the-one into my life to share this moment right now!!! right this minute !!!

At least now I can go forward again knowing that the best part of my life isn’t over, perhaps I am living it right now as a single woman, maybe it’s yet to come. But, right now am content and being so intimate with myself is by far one of the truest emotion i’ve experienced.

Let’s Not Forget

IMG_0298.JPG

I just want the world to remember ….

On this same day a few years back

You were called to heaven

Another Year Without You

25 is no age to die.

Missed you then , today and forever

Continue to rest with the Lord

Nothing left Unsaid (Oct . 3rd )

Love always ……………….. Mocha

House Special

IMG_0290.JPG

And so;

You stood there uttering the words “we are no longer fighting” … Pfff

How about the part where you finally take accountability for your action by labelling your doing and actually apologizing using “I statement” Instead of trying to call the shot on a situation that you clearly have no control over

Buddy , You Screwed Up. I expected you to pull a house special – something typical like avoiding, manipulating, playing the victim, not apologizing … you did just that!

By the way,

It is for this same reason that; I stared dead straight into your eyes while uttering this words. I will consider rebuilding once/if ever genuine accountability and mutual respect set in … For now with little to no expectation I shall remain politically correct mi amigo

trust is earned

I am Not tough, I Have boundaries

Signed,

This ruthless little me with her Very Loud Newly Found Voice in a dog-eat-dog type of family

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 45 other followers